9/18/09

This Ad Was Posted To Craig's List Personals


This was sent to me this morning by Sherri and I thought I would share it. If nothing else, it does spark discussion!


To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last. Date: 05-27-09, 1:43 AM EST. I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on my wife, threatening our lives and me. You also asked for my wife's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message. First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment when I drew my pistol after you took my Jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason. My wife had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 45 A CP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very Intimidating weapon when pointed at your head wasn't it? I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from bare footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again]. After I called your mother, or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I Went and filled up my gas tank as well as four other people's in the gas station on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful! I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go’s, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!] I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb ... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car. Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little over a day now, so what's going on with that? Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target. The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.). In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider the career path you've chosen to pursue in life. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky. Have a good day! Thoughtfully yours, Alex P.S. Remember this motto. . An armed society makes for a more civil society! -- "The future ain't what it used to be" Yogi Berra

15 comments:

Grampy said...

That is so funny. Is it a true story. My wife wouldn't like it. I feel it would be a great way to teach a lesson. No one got physically hurt. Very interesting indeed. I won't have a gun in the house because we watch our granddaughter. Even if I would I would have to hide it from my wife.Some say look out. If you have one you will use it. Or someone gets it and uses it on you. I am interested to see what people have to say.

Lin said...

I'm not sure this person is any better than the jerk who held him up initially. I mean, who would honestly be able to do all that (or even think of those things) to get even if you weren't such a person to begin with. This is what scares me about allowing people to arm themselves all the time. This dude is one trigger short of a murderer himself.

Carrie Wells said...

This is hilarious! I just ordered a taser online yesterday to protect myself when walking to my car at night from school. I guess this is what I will do if someone tries to mug me!

Unknown said...

oh brother. lol

Unknown said...

Finally, some good ole fashioned street justice. Gotta admit the "almost victim" had a pretty warped mind too.

But like they say...payback is hell!

SANDY said...

Hard to see here who the bad guy is. Somehow I don't think being a bigger jerk than the first jerk gets us anywhere.

Unless we're striving to lower our standards, it would seem to accomplish that.

Guns serve one purpose to kill, no one needs to be packing in my opinion. Then you get people who feel justified rooted on by others and pretty soon you've got more violence, a mob mentality. Not less violence.

Ann said...

I have heard that one before and I think it's hysterical. The guy got exactly what he deserved. (wether he's real or fictional)

Veronica Lee said...

That's a very interesting story! I hope I'll never be in this situation!

Cascia Talbert said...

Was this really on Craig's List? What a funny story.

Maria @ Conversations with Moms said...

If it is a true story, I'm sure the robber learned a lesson. That's crazy.

Anonymous said...

First time visitor to your blog.
:-)
That was truly hilarious. If true, awesome not...well, it was a good read anyway.

WillOaks Studio said...

All I can say is big wow!! What a tale!

Jude said...

It was an interesting read, but certainly not how I would have handled it. If my gun had been registered and legal I would simply have called the police and held him till they got there.It's not my place to teach anyone a lesson by the means the person placing the ad used if it's true.

Alesha @ Full Time Mama said...

I love this, although it seems a bit far fetched.
I find it amusing to read the comments about this guy being the bad guy for having a gun. HA!

Kori said...

A first time reader to your blog (and thank so much for stopping by mine this morning!), this cracked me up. Not so much the Craigslist ad (which made me laugh out loud, true or not) but at all of these comments. Thanks for a good chuckle to start my day!